Is it a joy or a burden talking with you?

The way we build, and the way we burn bridges…

3 min read

Matthew Jarvis
Financial Planner, CFP®

As I type this, I’m on a flight to La Paz, Mexico, for a couple of days of brainstorming and mountain biking with a rock-star advisor, Stephen Duck, from New Mexico. Unless you know Stephen personally, you’ll never hear about it as he’s not a main stage kind of guy. This is not because he isn’t a rock star advisor with a rock-star practice, but rather because he’s too busy delivering massive value to clients and living a highly intentional life to be bothered with stuff like that. 🙂

Because I choose to fly a lot, I’ve got my fair share of… interesting… flying experiences, but today’s takes the cake. As I was going to put my bag in the overhead bin, I noticed that the person before had put their bags in incorrectly. Hardly unusual, I began adjusting a couple of bags so that mine would fit. Suddenly the guy across the aisle yelled at me ‘DON’T TOUCH MY BAGS”. Being that it was a 5 am flight, I was startled by the amount of anger being directed my way. I responded, “Sir, your bag is not in the bin correctly, and I’m adjusting it so everything will fit.” Again he yells, ‘DON’T TOUCH MY BAG.’ By this time, two flight attendants, having heard the commotion arrive, grab his bag and throw it into the bin over his head, give him the stink-eye and apologize to me for the hassle.

Is-it-a-joy-or-a-burden-talking-with-you

Now, this guy was clearly way out of line, and I suppose I had every ‘right’ to respond to his anger with my own (believe me, I was tempted to do so), but what would I have gained by doing so? Sure my ego would have been stroked putting this guy in his place, but to what end? Either way, by responding professionally, the flight attendants immediately took my side.

What does this have to do with you and financial planning? Being with an upset client or a vendor that screwed something up, if you come in guns blazing, MAYBE you’ll get your way, but you will have burned a bridge. If instead, you come in as a problem solver full of positive energy, you have a much higher chance of success, you’ll BUILD relationship capital, AND it will make you a happier person.

This is not to say you need to be a wimp or not get your way. More on that tomorrow.

ACTION ITEM: Always look for opportunities to de-escalate.

HOW ABOUT YOU: What’s your go-to response when someone approaches you with anger or frustration?

Like what you just read?
Don’t keep this to yourself, share this article and improve a friends life!

Popular Topics

1

Secrets To Surging – What Other FA’s Don’t Tell You About Surging

Surge meetings happen with the Financial Advisors systematically holding client meetings in

2

Value Adds

If you are routinely providing clients with value adds in a consistent, efficient, and deliverable

3

Like Coke from a Coffee Mug: Run Your Best Client Meeting

Client meetings can be a dreaded part of a routine or you and your clients’ favorite part of your

4

Should We Buy Gold?

Spouses, come in to meet with you and they begin expressing concerns about inflation, the dollar

5

Let’s Take a Look At Your ADV

Before giving someone else advice about their practice, make sure you’re not the one speaking out

What You Should
READ NEXT

“This can’t be fixed”

How can you get the person who can fix your problem on your side vs. making their day

We are the average of the 5 people with whom we spend the most time – Jim Rohn

While I spent virtually no time one-on-one with either of these men, they became two of the five people that shaped my practice and my life.

Communicating with Clients

How many times have you taken a call from a client that really didn’t need you and needed a team member to help them make an appointment, update forms, relay information,

Start the change today!

Get our 3 most popular webinars FREE. You and your team will learn about: Time Blocking, the One Page Financial Plan, and the “Buckets of Money” approach.

    Contact Us